I'm not sick.... I just think I am.

So I went to the doctor on Saturday because my ear was hurting and was blocked. It turned out that I had a middle ear infection, and antibiotics would fix it. I hadn't been to this doctor before, so I thought it would be a good opportunity to ask her if she had any ideas about my health issues. I told her about how I can feel my pulse throughout my body, and at first she was confused about what I meant by that. She asked questions and I explained further. She didn't really know what it could be because I have already had tests done for all of the nasty stuff that I could have, and those tests came back clear. She told me that sometimes some people feel things in their body more than other people. I thought it was an interesting answer. I think she said something about a hyper sensitivity.
Anyway, then we talked a bit about my stomach problems and how I think it is IBS... and we talked about how I have had a sore throat for just about 11 months, and how it has gotten worse. She asked a bunch of questions about that too, and eventually came to the conclusion that it was stress related. She also said something about how sometimes thinking about sickness makes it worse. I can't remember her exact words... but I think what she meant was that my brain has tricked my body in to thinking that I am more sick than I am....
 e.g. When I first got my sore throat I didn't pay much attention to it... I had gotten a sore throat on and off lately anyway... but when it got to the 3 week mark of having my sore throat, I started thinking about how odd it is to have it for so long. ......Now I think about it, 3 weeks with a sore throat isn't that uncommon, especially for a person who spends time around children (I wasn't working with children at that time, but it was flu season, and I was teaching Sunday school at the time)...... But back then, 3 weeks with a sore throat wasn't normal and I stared thinking about it a lot. I tried a bunch of natural remedies which didn't work, and then I sore my doctor at 7 weeks of the sore throat. I had blood tests done and I was given ideas, the blood tests were clear, and I have had many more blood tests done, and seen more doctors about it etc etc etc. Somewhere along the line, I started worrying about it, and that is most likely when my brain did something crazy and because of that, my throat is still sore and will be probably until I work through it with a psychologist.
It makes sense! It is confusing, but our brains can do weird things. It especially makes sense because there are no visible signs in my throat of a chronic sore throat. I think my doctor is on to something! I hope she is right too... because it was getting to the point where there was nothing that could be done.
I might partly I have a big bug and a low immune system... I'm working with children daily now....It is normal to be sick at the start of a childcare career. But I think in the long run, I'm making it worse thinking about it. I would have never have thought about it this way if it wasn't for the ear infection I had....
I believe that God gave me this ear infection on a Friday night, so that I wouldn't go to my usual medical centre the next day (they are not open Saturdays), so that I could visit a doctor who had different ideas for me. My past 3 doctors have said that it is related to stress, but I didn't fully believe it until this doctor explained it the way she did.

Just something to think about.

http://christiancounsellor.wix.com/freecounselling

Relationship advice?

Ok, so this is not really like me... asking for advice over the Internet from randoms (although I know that those who follow my blog are not randoms)... but I haven't been able to talk to my mentor since last year, and all I want is your thoughts on my issue.

So Rob and I have been going out for 3 years and 11 months (4 years in two weeks!). We have been engaged for almost 8 months... and... IT'S DRIVING ME INSANE!!!!
I'm not patient... and I think surely God must be trying to teach us both patience... but jee I just want to be married to Rob right now!  So many people I know have gotten married in the past few years. I know an old friend of mine only got engaged about a month ago, and she is getting married in October. I'll admit, I'm very jealous! Rob and I probably won't have enough money to get married, until the end of next year!
We both want to know that we'll be with each other when we go to bed and when we wake up (and a little bit in between). I'm sick of saying goodbye to him, it sucks! When I went to the Bunya Mountains with him and his family a few weeks ago, I didn't want to say goodnight to him... I had the pleasure of a Queen size bed, and I craved to share it with him... not to fool around in... I simply craved to have him with me all night, holding me, keeping me safe. The bed felt so empty with tiny me in it. I was also scared, because the room was pitch black with the lights off. Rob declined when I asked him to stay with me... and it was the right thing for him to do... but I freaked out quite a bit, being alone.
I want to know if what I am describing, sounds normal to you?
I watch Home and Away quite a lot ... and what I have noticed in the past months, is that some of the couples will be together somewhere, talking or whatever, and then they have to part for whatever reason. The girl in the relationship doesn't cry when the guy has to leave... They both say their quick kissy goodbyes and that is it.
Well... I can't do that. I cry almost every time Rob has to go. I know he has to go, and that makes it worse.
I desperately want married life. I know they say that it is hard work being married, and fights occur more often..... but we will deal with that when it comes. I want to get married!!!!
Rob and I watch a lot of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. I have all 10 seasons on DVD, and we have just finished watching season 6. We love the show (me especially), it is funny... and it is good seeing strong lasting friendships. The problem  with it though, is that there is not one episode that hasn't got some kind of suss reference in it. Since we have been watching it for the past few months, it has been a bit hard for me to grasp what is right and what is wrong. Right now Monica and Chandler are living together, and obviously sleeping together. In the last episode of season 6, Chandler proposes. Technically it is round the wrong way. God makes it obvious in the bible that couples should leave, cleave, and then become one. Firstly a couple should find out weather they are right for each other, then they should be engaged ( in my opinion for more than a month) and then they are to marry, and leave their homes to make a new home (that is the leave part) then they can have intercourse (cleaving and becoming one). Part of that means growing closer emotionally. What God intends is important.
Watching tv shows like F.R.I.E.N.D.S, makes me realise how wrong society is... but it has become so normal to me that I find it almost acceptable. I thought it was cute when Monica and Chandler first... you know... and then when they moved in together. That is most likely why I asked Rob to sleep in my bed at the Bunya mountains. It felt ok. I figured that we love each other and that we will marry, so it is fine... it is just sleeping and cuddling that is all. It's wrong though, and we both know it. Rob and I will never have sex before marriage, we see the importance in keeping pure and having control, after all, God is our Father and he knows best.... but I'm impatient with almost everything else! *sigh* .

Is it normal for a christian couple to be this impatient? I know that there are many christians who have had sex before marriage, but I still feel weird. Am I too attached to Rob?

Any ideas would be appreciated... mostly prayer. xo.

Fuzzy wuzzy

Fuzzy Wuzzy Was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, so Fuzzy Wuzzy Wasn't Fuzzy Was he? ^^

Another personality quiz thingamajig ^^

1: The last person you kissed screams they love you, you say... Yeah, I know Rob, I love you too ;)  

2: Did you get to sleep in today? Depends what you call "sleep in" I woke up at 9:30 to get ready for work, but I could have slept longer
3: You never know what you got until you lose it? Yeah, sometimes.
4: Do you have siblings? Yep, two older brothers
5: How many kids do you want? 2 or 3
6: Who was the last person you held hands with? Rob
7: Did you stand on your tippy-toes for your last kiss? Yes xD
8: Do you think if you died, the last person you kissed would care? Absolutely
9: Last person to talk on the phone? Rob
10: Did anyone watch you the last time you kissed someone? Nope.
11: When’s your birthday? 23/06/92
12: Remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed? Mhmm, we were sitting on a couch ^^
13: What kind of phone do you have? Samsung Galaxy Ace
14: Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants? Jeans
15: Are you a different person now than you were 5 years ago? Yep… and same goes for everyone… dah!
16: What were you doing at 4 am? Sleeping
17: Would you rather write a paper or give a speech? Speech
18: Are you lying to yourself about something? I don’t know… am I?
19: Last night you felt…? A combination of tired, warn out, and hypo
20: What’s something you cannot wait for? I’m going away on Friday for the whole weekend with Rob and his family, to the Bunya mountains!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
21: Ever told your parents you were going somewhere but when somewhere different? Perhaps  >>
22: How many hours of sleep did you get last night? 9ish
23: Are you a morning or night person? Night!
24: What did you get your last bruise from? A blood test
25: Do you reply to all of your texts? Most of them… it depends who it is
26: Your phone is ringing, It’s the person you fell hardest for. What do you do? Well it would be Rob, so I would say “Hey Babe”
27: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed? Nope, we were at my front door
28: Anyone you would like to get things straight with? Yes
29: How many months until your birthday? 11 months
30: Favorite thing to eat with peanut butter? I don’t like peanut butter
31: Did you like this past summer? I dunno
32: What were you doing before you got on the computer? I was at work
33: Your ex is sitting next to you, with their new partner. What do you do? Probably talk to them.
34: What is the last thing you said out loud? “Cool”
35: Your mood summed into one word? Eh
36: Are you doing anything else besides taking this survey? Nope, but just about to take a Psychology quiz
37: What are your initials? EK
38: Are you a happy person? Let’s just say, I’m VERY emotional
39: Do you still talk to the person you liked 4 months ago? Haha, yes I do still talk to my fiancé!
40: Where do you want to live when you’re older? I want to live in a big house… somewhere nice… that is close to where I live now
41: Have you had your birthday this year? Yep, last month, I went to Australia Zoo ^^
42: What did you do yesterday? I worked… then I went to the shops and bought chocolates and flowers for Rob’s Mum for her birthday… Then I went to Girls Brigade, where me made a giant obstacle course… then I went to Rob’s and had dinner with his family, and watched the “Puss in Boots” movie…. Then I went home and went to sleep.
43: What will you be doing tomorrow? Working… and then going to the shops to by myself an iPod
44: How late did you stay up last night? Till 12:00
45: Is there anyone you would do anything for? Yes.
46: Is it hard to make you laugh? Not really
47: Do you believe ex’s can be just friends? Of course….depending on the situation
48: Do you think any of your exes will eventually want to be with you again? Don’t know and don’t care.
49: How many people have you had feelings for in the year of 2012? 1
50: Do you wish your ex was dead? I don’t wish ANYONE dead.
51: Have you ever dyed your hair? Nope
52: Would ever take back someone that cheated? Probably not, I wouldn’t be able to trust them, even if they had changed…. But that doesn’t matter because I have Rob <3
53: Was New Year’s Even enjoyable? Yer
54: Bet you’re missing someone right now? Definitely!
55: How would your parents react if you got a tattoo? They might freak a little bit, but they would have to respect my decision. I would probably tell them first.
56: Sleep on your back or stomach? Depends
57: If you could move away, no questions asked, where would it be? Somewhere with Rob
58: What would you change about your life right now? So many things, I could write a whole book about it.
59: Has anything upset you in the past week? Yep
60: Are you on the phone? Nah
61: Today, would you rather go forward a week or back? Forward!
62: Would you take $40,000 or a brand new car? $40,000... I want a wedding!
63: Have you ever talked to someone when they were high? Nope
64: Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone? Yes.
65: Have you ever copied someone elses homework? Maybe *shifty eyes*… but they let me.
66: Are you the type of person who likes to be out or at home? Home
67: Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up? Yes, it’s the first thing I do
68: Have you ever stayed up all night on the phone? Nup
69: Could you use some sleep right now? Mhmm, but I can’t sleep during the day
70: Are you going to have a baby by the time you’re 18? Uhm, I’m 20, so no
71: Does it bother you when someone hides things from you? Yes, the truth shouldn’t be bottled up
72: What’s your favourite colour? Pink
73: Have you ever slept in the same room with someone you liked? Yep… all night movie night at youth group…. Lol Ben Austin
74: Have you ever been looking for something and it was already in your hand? Quite often
75: Do you get annoyed easily? Can do
76: If someone liked you, would you want them to tell you? Hmm I get curious if people have feelings for me, but I don’t really need to know, because I have Rob
77: Do you have a person of the opposite sex that you can tell everything to? Yes
78: Does anyone call you babe? Yes
79: How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? A few, but I wouldn’t necessarily tell them everything
80: What do you prefer, relationship or one night stand? Relationship
81: What colour hoodie did you wear last? Grey (am wearing it now)
82: Is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and isn’t around anymore? Yeah. :(

Bible Emergency Numbers

I wrote these down a few nights ago, and they definitely come in handy. I would absolutely recommend you have a read of these verses in each of these situations.The bible is our guideline for living and learning, and we would be lost without it.