We all have different lives, and this blog is revealing some of mine :) enjoy!

God bless

Friday, December 30, 2011


মি নামে ইস এলিস্সা ই হাভে অন আমাজিং ফিয়ান্চে কাল্লেদ রব হে ইস থে বেস্তেস্ট বেস্টিই ইভের

Thursday, December 29, 2011

No Pain

Right now, I'm not feeling any pain what so ever. I am at peace. I am happy.
This year, I got into a real bad place in my mind. A place that I wouldn't wish for anyone else to go. I may have seemed normal to people who know me, like my church family.... but I wasn't. I was messed up, and I didn't know the way out. There were times where I was sitting in Rob's car with him on a Sunday night after church, where I would be balling my eyes out and pulling at my hair, because something was disturbing me inside. Rob sore a side of me, that I wish he didn't have to see. He was also with me one afternoon when I was doing my last TAFE assignment, I was freaking out, screaming, fighting with my Dad and everything... I wanted my life to end there. Actually, that wasn't the first or the last time I thought about dying.
I know this story sounds rather dramatic, but it is the truth. I wanted to die. No one should want to die.Unfortunately when Satan gets into someones emotions, it is hard to get him out.
In August, I went into "She is... Free" camp, confused... and  I came out free. I still struggled a bit afterwards, but I had stopped harming myself completely, and I had no intention of killing myself, the thought didn't even enter my mind. For the past few months, I have been trying to get over my year. I didn't really know how to escape the memory, and I sort of wanted to forget it all together. I felt like it was creeping up behind me.
Now, I don't feel the need to escape my memories of this year, because just this month, I realised that the troubles I went through, benefited me. Yes, I hated my emotional pain, and I hated that I was causing myself physical pain... as I said, I wouldn't wish it on anyone.... but God used my pain to teach me.
The big lesson He has taught me is that I can always depend on Him to pull me through. At the moment, He is still teaching me patience. I have been praying for patience for most of the year, and I wasn't seeing any change,,, but now I realise that He has been teaching me all along, by giving me situations in where I have to be patient. God isn't just going to take my struggles away, because then I wouldn't learn. Now I am practicing patience.

I am grateful. God never gave me the chance to become mentally Ill. I thought I was at one stage, but it was all Satan's way of fooling me into thinking that life sucked. Life does kind of suck for millions of people... I look on 3rd world countries, and I hear about their stories. On top of not having enough food and clean water, they have to face violence in a lot of the countries.... but I don't have to deal with that. I also don't have to deal with mental illness of any sort. God has provided me with more than I need. I'm happy. There is still a lot of work to be done... and I know there are times where I will fall... but I have a good teacher.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011


So I requested ideas to blog about and the first idea I get is Unicorns.

 Just for you Kat!

I decided to look "Unicorns" up in Urban dictionary... here is what I got:

The Romans called what we now know as rhinoceros a "unicornus".
Later, they evolved into two species:
1. the white unicorn (of horselike appearance with one beautiful horn on the center of its head)
2. the pink unicorn (of unknown appearance, as it is invisible)
Plinius: Look, a unicorn. What impressive and massive legs!
Walt: Oh, it's lovely! Well, if I draw it as a white horse with a horn...
Scott: I don't believe in unicorns. Besides, it's pink. 

Yeh... weird.

And this is what Dictionary.com had to say about Unicorns:



[yoo-ni-kawrn] Show IPA
a mythical creature resembling a horse, with a single horn in the center of its forehead: often symbolic of chastity or purity.
a heraldic representation of this animal, in the form of a horse with a lion's tail and with a long, straight, and spirally twisted horn.
( initial capital letter ) Astronomy . the constellation Monoceros.
an animal mentioned in the Bible, Deut. 33:17: now believed by some to be a description of a wild ox or rhinoceros.
a former gold coin of Scotland, first issued by James III in 1486, having an obverse bearing the figure of a unicorn.
And just for fun... here is Charlie The Unicorn!!


I hope you enjoyed this blog post.

What should I blog about?

Ideas please!? Give me topics to blog about and I will blog about them.... maybe.

While I'm waiting.


Monday, December 26, 2011

An INCREDIBLY long survey

So I am reeeaaallly bored.... and I found this survey on facebook... it has 200 questions :/ I am going to attempt it.... and I'm pretty sure after 50, you will have given up reading it.... but anyway, here goes:

200: My middle name is:
199: I was born in: 1992 in the Royal Women's Hospital.
198: I am really:
in love and mostly happy, but I have a lot on my mind at the moment. 197: My cellphone company is: I have a Mobile phone, not a Cellphone, and the company is Optus.
196: My eye color is:
195: My shoe size is: 7/8 usually.
194: My ring size is:
G .
193: My height is: I have no idea! I like to say medium.
192: I am allergic to:
Mozzies, epiduo, maybe bandaids, possibly milk (it gives me sinus infections), and all sorts of skin related things. 191: My 1st car was: I have never had a first car, I don't even have my learners licence. 190: My 1st job was: was and still is casual work as a group leader at Brookside Childcare Centre. 189: Last book you read: The Shack 188: My bed is: Comfy 187: My pet: Is a male yellow Aivary Cockatiel called Joey. 186: My best friend: Rob, and Jesus. 185: My favorite shampoo is: Head and Shoulders! 184: AIM name: -E-
183: Piggy banks are:
Usually china pigs with a slot at the top that someone puts money in to save up, and either breaks it open, or opens the plug at the bottom to get all of the money out.... that is unless I missed something? 182: In my pockets: My phone.
181: On my calendar:
Uhm... months and numbers with lots of important dates. 180: Marriage is: pretty amazing I hear!
179: Spongebob can: be a sponge. 178: My mom: My Mum: is embarrassing, but also fun and silly, she gives really good hugs!
177: The last three cd's I bought were?
Uhm... Relient.K is for Karaoke, Let it Snow Baby Let it Reindeer,  The Birds and The Beesides. I don't buy cd's often, 176: Last YouTube video watched: Boxing day, by Relient.K 175: How many cousins do you have? In order.... David (cousin in law) Peter, Adelle, Lachlan, Andrew, Josh (cousin in law), Cassie, Joshua, Kiara, Taryn, Callan, Sarah, Dillon, Connor.... so that is, 14.
174: Do you have any siblings?
Yep... Matt (23), Tim (21).
173: Are your parents divorced?
Nope. 172: Are you taller than your mom? My Mum? Nope.
171: Do you play an instrument?
170: What did you do yesterday?
It was Christmas! I had a very busy day attending church and seeing family.

[ I Believe In ]
169: Love at first sight:
Nope... I believe in feelings at first sight, but love takes time to develop. Love never fails.
168: Luck:
is something made up, to excuse the fact that God exists. Luck is not real.
167: Fate:
Well... not really... God has a plan for us  (Jeremiah 29:11). 166: Yourself: Not really, but I believe that I can do anything with Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13) 165: Aliens: Lol, nope. 164: Heaven: Yes, it exists, but only for those who follow Jesus (John 3:16 and Luke 9:23) 163: Hell: It exists for those who don't follow Jesus... Hell is a place where God isn't.  162: God: 100% Yes. I am His Daughter. 161: Horoscopes: Nope, a load of rubbish so that people can earn money. Horoscopes and future telling is demonic. 160: Soul mates: ? 159: Ghosts: It may sound strange, but yes I do. A few friends whom I trust to not lie, have said that they have seen ghosts. However I believe that they are demonic beings, not people who have died, and haven't reached heaven or hell yet. 158: Gay Marriage: It is wrong. I'm not a homophobe... I simply just believe that loving someone of the same sex, is sin. God didn't create us to love the same sex. No one is born homosexual, although some people think they were. I'm  not saying that I am any better than a homosexual. I sin too, and all sins are equal to God. God loves homosexuals, he just doesn't like the act of homosexuality. 157: War: Is sad. War shouldn't ever happen. But I still support those who do fight for our country and I admire those who have sacrificed their lives for our country. 156: Orbs: No! 155: Magic: Nope, but I believe in Miracles.
[ This or That ]
154: Hugs or Kisses:
Depends who from... I love hugs from almost everyone, but I love both from Rob. If I had to choose between hugging or kissing Rob, I simply couldn't choose!
153: Drunk or High:
Spiritually High (getting drunk or high from drugs, is silly and harmful to the body). 152: Phone or Online: Online. 151: Red heads or Black heads: Red.
150: Blondes or Brunettes:
149: Hot or cold:
Just right.
148: Summer or winter:
Winter. 147: Autumn or Spring: Autumn.
146: Chocolate or vanilla:
Chocolate. 145: Night or Day: I think they are both wonderful. 144: Oranges or Apples: Apples.
143: Curly or Straight hair:
Wavy! 142: McDonald's or Burger King: Both! (Hungry Jacks though, we don't have Burger King) 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate:Milk Chocolate. 140: Mac or PC: No preference. 139: Flip flops or high heals: Pluggers. 138: Ugly and rich OR Sexy and poor: No idea.
137: Coke or Pepsi: Coke.
136: Hillary or Obama:
Obama, not that it matters, because I'm Aussie. 135: Buried or cremated: Buried. 134: Singing or Dancing: Singing. 133: Coach or Chanel: Chanel... only because I've never heard of Coach. 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Who? 131: Small town or Big city: Small town. 130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target.
129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler:
Adam Sandler. 128: Manicure or Pedicure: Both! 127: East Coast or West Coast: Uhm? 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas. Jesus Birthday! 125: Chocolate or Flowers: Flowers. 124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney. 123: Yankees or Red Sox: Again I say,,, Uhm?,,, Does this have to do with Baseball or something?
[ Here's What I Think About ]
122: War:
As I already mentioned earlier, war is sad, and I don't like it. But I do respect the people who fight and sacrifice their lives for our country. 121: George Bush: Don't care. 120: Gay Marriage: I discussed this earlier. 119: The presidential election: Don't care. 118: Abortion: Is wrong. It is murder. Look up180 movie on YouTube. 117: MySpace: Fail. 116: Reality TV: Can be fun to watch, but I'm not into Big Brother, Biggest Looser, or Australia's Next top Model. I like the renovation and make over shows.
115: Parents:
Are important. They brought me into this world, and I respect them.
114: Back stabbers:
They are what they are... but they shouldn't be bitched about, you should forgive them. 113: EBay: lol it is good.
112: Sex:
It should be kept within marriage. It is where husband and wife become one. God made it to be special, and fun. 111: Work: It is important to work. I complain about it all the time, and wish that I could earn money by doing nothing, but I believe that work is important to God, therefore it is important to me. 110: My Neighbors: I don't really talk to them,,, but they are friendly. 109: Gas Prices: Are stupid! We have heaps of petrol, the rising of prices are because the petrol companies are greedy. 108: Designer Clothes: Are over rated and usually uncomfortable. 107: College: It is a place to learn and make friends that you probably won't talk to after you leave.
106: Sports: Yeah, it is ok I suppose. Depending on what sports. I'm not fond of Cricket or Tennis. I don't really play any sports, but I do like to watch some. NRL is amazing. 105: My family: Is great. We have had our disagreements, but we are close, and we all have a relationship with Jesus. 104: The future: The future shouldn't be thought about too much. We can plan it, but when we try to live in the future without being ready, it can lead to pain. 

[ Last time I ]
103: Hugged someone: 
I hugged Mum earlier today. 102: Last time you ate: I ate custard and Whisky pudding about an hour ago. 101: Saw someone I haven't seen in awhile: I sore Rach a week or two ago... I hadn't seen her since October. 100: Cried in front of someone: I cried in front of Rob last night.
99: Went to a movie theater:
The last movie I went to see was Lion King in 3D... that was September. 98: Took a vacation: When I was 10, we went to Caloundra as a family. 97: Swam in a pool:  At The Hypermarket for our GB divisional swimming afternoon... that was October or November I think. 96: Changed a diaper: Changed a nappy: When I was last in the babies room at childcare 3 weeks ago. I changed LOTS. 95: Got my nails done: Never have, and probably never will. I have heard bad stories about nail parlors. 94: Went to a wedding: I went to my Cousin Cassie's wedding last year in September. 93: Broke a bone: I have never broken a bone.
92: Got a piercing:
I got my ears pierced for my year 12 formal in 2009. 91: Broke the law: I have probably J walked a number of times... I don't know when was the last. 90: Texted: I texted Rob at 1:32 am this morning.
[ MISC ]
89: Who makes you laugh the most:
My brother Tim. 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: Mum and Dad. I will probably miss heaps, but that's ok, because I'll have Rob. 87: The last movie I saw: Red Dog (watched it at Rob's house last night).
86: The thing that I'm looking forward to the most:
Marrying Rob. 85: The thing I'm not looking forward to: Washing up tonight! 84: People call me: E, Liss, Lissa, Elissa. 83: The most difficult thing to do is: Maths! Hehe.
82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Nope, I don't even drive! 81: My zodiac sign is: Don't know, don't care

80: The first person i talked to today was: Dad.
79: First time you had a crush:
In grade 4, Jake Thompson. 78: The one person who i can't hide things from: Rob. He knows everything.
77: Last time someone said something you were thinking:
I dunno, it happens all the time. 76: Right now I am talking to: James, on msn. 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Lol, I'm grown up sort of. I plan to be a full time Group leader in a Childcare Centre, as soon as someone is willing to employ me! 74: I have/will get a job: I have a casual job, and I want a full time job. 73: Tomorrow: I am going to Rob's house to watch movies.
72: Today:
I lazed around and ate junk. 71: Next Summer: I don't know. 70: Next Weekend: Is New years! Time to party!
69: I have these pets: A pet Cockatiel. Norm the Great Dane just moved out with Tim. 68: The worst sound in the world:  Brr, the screeching of nails against a blackboard. It is not only the worst sound, but the worst feeling! 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: Dad, when we fight. 66: People that make you happy: Rob, friends, family. 65: Last time I cried: Last night. 64: My friends are: friendly. 63: My computer is: Not really mine.
62: My School:
Was Ferny Grove State High School, and Ferny Hills Primary School. 61: My Car: I don't have a car. 60: I lose all respect for people who: Don't respect me. Who ruin their lives and others. However I still love them, because God loves them. 59: The last movie I cried at was: Red Dog.
58: Your hair color is:
Blond 57: TV shows you watch: F.R.I.E.N.D.S, Home and Away. I watch others, but not on a regular basis. 56: Favorite web site: Facebook. 55: Your dream vacation: I don't have one. 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: I had a really bad back in June this year, I couldn't sit, stand or lie down without being in pain. 53: How do you like your steak cooked: Medium. 52: My room is: cozy. I love it, but I wish it was bigger. 51: My favorite celebrity is: I don't have one. 50: Where would you like to be: Cuddled up somewhere with Rob. 49: Do you want children: Yes, probably 3. 48: Ever been in love: Yes, and I always will be. 47: Who's your best friend: Jee, there are a lot of repeats in this survey.... as I said earlier: Rob and Jesus. 46: More guy friends or girl friends: I have an equal amount. My closest friends are guy friends.... but my oldest friends are girl friends. 45: One thing that makes you feel great is: Kisses from Rob. 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: Rob.
43: Do you have a 5 year plan:
Nope... but I plan to get married somewhere in there. 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: Yes. 41: Have you pre-named your children: I have some ideas.
40: Last person I got mad at: Dad
39: I would like to move to:
No where, I love it here. 38: I wish I was a professional: Pianist.
[ My Favorites ]
37: Candy:
Jelly Beans!
36: Vehicle:
Not really sure. 35: President: Don't care. 34: State visited: Never been out of QLD. Well, I have been on the border of NSW, but I wouldn't call it a visit.
33: Cellphone provider:
32: Athlete:
Don't have one. 31: Actor: Robin Williams. 30: Actress: Don't have one. 29: Singer: Matt Thiesson. 28: Band: Relient.K
27: Clothing store:
JJ's. 26: Grocery store: Woolies. 25: TV show: F.R.I.E.N.D.S. 24: Movie: The Lion King. 23: Website: facebook (again, you have already asked me this). 22: Animal: Wombat. 21: Theme park: I don't go to theme parks.
20: Holiday:
Christmas. 19: Sport to watch: NRL. 18: Sport to play: Badminton. 17: Magazine: I don't read magazines. 16: Book: The Bible.
15: Day of the week:
Sunday. 14: Beach: Alex Headlands beach at the Sunny Coast. 13: Concert attended: Youth alive 09. Relient.K performed. 12: Thing to cook: Spag Bog. 11: Food: Shepherds pie. 10: Restaurant: Golden Palace Chinese restaurant Yum Cha. 9: Radio station: 96.5 and 4kQ
8: Yankee candle scent:
7: Perfume:
Don't have one. 6: Flower: Violets.
5: Color:
Pink. 4: Talk show host: Don't have one.
3: Comedian:
Adam Hill. 2: Dog breed: Great Dane. 1: Are you ready for this survey to be over: YES!