Well let's just say that I am angry. I am depressed. I am confused.
I am angry at myself for being so impatient... for being messed up. The truth is, it is not exactly my fault that I am messed up inside. I have said this many times, my childhood has lead me to be so messed up..... but I am still angry at myself..... I could try harder to fix this. Sure Jesus is there to help me too... but I need to try harder... Jesus isn't going to fix me just like that is He? He could... but I am pretty sure, He would rather I try then give up..... so I am angry because I'm not good enough.
But in times of trouble, when I don't feel like praying, and I feel like I am loosing it..... I go to music. Relient.K in particular. I came across this song.... and listened to the words... and again, it is a song that completely relates to me. It told me what I need to do. Let it all out.
Here it is... please, check it out. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rUtyfB6gVU&feature=related