We all have different lives, and this blog is revealing some of mine :) enjoy!

God bless

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Psalm 13

For the director of music. A psalm of David.
1 How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?

2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,

4 and my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.

6 I will sing the Lord's praise,
for he has been good to me.

I usually try to pick out one or two things I like about my bible readings, but I think this whole Psalm relates to me. 
What Dave wrote here, is interesting, but so true to me. Sometimes it feels as though God has forgotten me. I feel like He has left me to sort out my own problems without any help from Him. I am left wrestling with my thoughts, and I can't seem to find peace. It is like I have asked Father to help me, and I can't hear Him. I start to question my worth, I question if God is listening at all. I know God my Father, my creator, has answered my prayers many many times, yet I start to loose faith when I am low, and I can't feel his presence in me. I feel as though if God doesn't answer soon, I will give up... I become impatient with Him. Sometimes though... suddenly I am reminded that I can trust Him, and then I feel as though I have no choice but to be patient, and then I feel refreshed. This basically sums up what I was feeling in the past few months, and how I feel now. I was low, and lost, and confused, wondering why God wasn't just helping me get over my attention seeking problem... but a few weeks ago, my need for attention worsened, and I started to feel as though I am a burden. I was expecting too much from people... I then realised that I have no choice but to hold on, be patient, and to trust in God again, or I will cause a lot of pain to myself and other people. I felt relief, I felt comfortable... and now I know that God has started answering my prayer. He IS helping me, and although I still have that same attention seeking problem... and it is going to take a while to get rid of.... I am praying, and have people praying for me. I feel happier, and am trying much harder to let go. It is working... I am on the road to recovery! Does this Psalm mean anything to you?

God bless
Love -E- xx

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